Being sentimental is a lot of work...
A tradition that will never die! The mandatory family photo before gift opening...accompanied by a level of incompetent camera operation that first makes us cringe and eventually makes us laugh.
So – we
had a good Christmas time. I really enjoyed it this year. I guess it seemed
like a breeze compared to getting ready for a wedding. And the wedding had gone
so well that I was full of satisfaction as Christmas time started, and nothing
could go badly enough to wreck that sense of good will.
Being of
good will, and also tired, I had a much more relaxed outlook on what I expected
of the holiday season and I learned a few things. The most important truth that
came home to me this year was that being sentimental is a lot of work. I
determined to cut back on that. All these “But we always have…” and “It has to
be on…” and “But our favorite things must all be present or it isn’t
Christmas”…sentiments really stress me out! Oh yes – there are some things that
should never change, but there are a lot of things that don’t matter a whit.
And I put a lot of effort into them…What for?
I got to
contemplating this a year or two ago when my mom mentioned, at our family
Christmas party, “…and I have the flashing lights out!” She said it so
triumphantly that I had to query…”Oh – what for?” “Well -- I always have some
flashing lights on when you all come for the party!” Uh—sorry Mom, I never
noticed.
Poor Mom…all
that work to maintain a tradition that we were unaware of.
Anyway,
that got me to thinking about some of the things I made sure were done just the
same way every Christmastime…even when it was pretty hard to accomplish…and
took note as to whether there was any evidence that anyone else noticed. If I
doubted it, that “tradition” was done – and few others that I found especially
obnoxious were jettisoned as well.
It’s so
freeing to not be sentimental!!! I mean, what did I think was going to happen
if we didn’t put all the kids old ornaments on the tree?? Would none of us have
any fun if they were absent from the branches? I know that I would have MORE
fun if I didn’t have to find places for them all…and still for years I fussed
over them.
And I have
to say that this whole “let’s give the kids an ornament each year and then they
will have enough to decorate their own tree when they move out” ritual sure
backfired…No one wanted to take their ornaments when they moved out. The little
bears and snowmen and trains and angels just didn’t fit any theme tree they
decided to create. So the ornaments stayed at my house, and my tree was perused
for these themeless wonders…. And they would report an absence if I hadn’t put
all of them out.
Well, let
freedom ring! Let the white dove stay in the box of kid ornaments that is
stashed in a closet waiting for little grandkid hands to lovingly destroy! They
don’t fit my theme anymore either…My theme is “guiltless”!
I think
I’m going to have to admit that sentimentality has just a little bit (or maybe
a lot) of superstition in it. Just like the guys who don’t shave, or always
wear the same socks, or do the same ritual before the game, we have to do the
same rituals to win a Happy Christmastime. We don’t dare stop because what if
that little action is what our victory hinges on…
I decided
to go on faith that a Happy Christmastime, and a Happy Life don’t hinge on
superstitious sentimentality. I dropped some rituals, and didn’t even wait for
the other shoe to drop. And nothing bad happened! Even though we had turkey
dinner leftovers, and then pizza, on Christmas Day, we had a wonderful time
together.
No one
even asked where their ornaments were…{insert wink, and satisfied smile}.
Now I
can’t wait to jettison some more sentimentality during the rest of the year!
Comments
Wonderful family picture!