Keepin' it real...
(Okay -- I may be busy, but I WILL make time for this!)
I’ve been
really busy…and I’m not too good at it.
I consider
myself a “small plate” person. My plate fills up pretty quickly as far as
activities go. I wish it were different, but try as I might to enlarge my
plate, it has only increased a little.
And let me
say right now that I know I am
really, REALLY blessed to be able to tailor my activity to fit my small plate.
True, our summers on the farm are FULL of busyness, but the rest of the year we
have plenty of flexibility.
Because of
that flexibility, I have been able to work in the place of my friend, Sharice,
who is recovering (well, I might add!) from her surprise (that’s the nice way
to say it) open heart surgery. It’s a chance for me to put into action God’s
admonition to “bear one another’s burdens”, and if it makes Sharice’s burden
lighter, I am happy to do it.
But
truthfully, I’m having a little trouble getting my feet under me! I feel a
little lost when I look at my day, and wonder how it’s all going to fit. A bit
of paralysis sets in when I try to decide which task should be first.
Thankfully, it’s easy to decide to just go to work at the truck repair shop,
and worry about the rest later.
The past
month has been full of calendar events, so I have just moved from the first
urgent demand to the next urgent thing. Most weeks, I have had more than one
event scheduled for 4 out of the seven days of the week. Not the norm for me!
It makes
evident that I am not good at internal motivations. I am pushed along by the
external schedule until a little free time appears and I’m not sure where I am,
and what I should be doing, and woe to the hubby who asks when dinner will be
ready.
Not good,
really -- not good…
I still
need to learn to be a grown-up, and make my own choices instead of jumping into
the River of Urgency and getting swept away. I haven’t grown out of The Good
Dutch Girl mindset that expects that no activity or responsibility can be dropped
in a season of busyness – The house must be kept up, the cooking continue, the
schedule must be kept…Really, there is stuff that CAN be let go, while more
important issues take the forefront in my schedule! (I’m thinking cooking and
cleaning are the best things to jettison! {wink,wink})
So once
again, God is using circumstances to remind me that I still have a lot of
growing up to do. I avoid being busy most of the time, and this season of
busyness is teaching me that more lessons need to be learned.
You may
notice me muttering to myself…I am likely saying, “Come on, Leslie! Be a
grown-up!”
Or I might
be wondering what I came into the room for…
I’ve
noticed that busyness exacerbates the mental pauses of age and The Big M…
But it
does keep life interesting…If you can remember it.
Comments
I am cheering you on. Loudly!
Your writing was good for me today as I seem to be frozen this morning. Grow up, Tami!
Thanks for the inspiration and do hang in there my friend! Oh and just go out to eat ;)